I know a good tailor.

It’s kind of late in the day of the weekday I usually post to my blog.  Usually, it’s Tuesday, sometimes Wednesday, last week I did not post at all because of the 4^th of July holiday week taking up much of my own time and, I imagine, a lot of yours.

 

We also started the demolition process on the house! Let me catch you up…we tore off the deck right after the 4^th.  We thought it would be nice if we waited until the people were off it, you know.  In so doing, we moved my twisted Harry Lauder Walking Stick bush to a new spot.  Now, I don’t know if Harry will make it but since there was a tractor here with forks that could lift it right out of the ground, we thought why not try.  We tore apart the old shed, but it still has some standing walls.  We removed the bay window in the dining room, which will soon be open to the new living room.  We confirmed a start date for the mason to do the foundation AND we are about 98% in agreement for the kitchen design.  That’s serious and puts us well underway.  I think.  There is junk everywhere people, and torn up yard, mud and clay.  I am in serious need of a dumpster.  My little shed is a bit of a respite for these messy times and I enjoy going out there to sit, and ponder what lies ahead.

We are also on the list for the tree removal service, if they ever decide to respond to an email.

 

My entire house is a mess.  Things need to come out of cabinets and closets.  Chairs are shoved out of the way, the counter is full of plans and tools.  Hubs and I are able, so far, to keep track of each other but don’t ask where the measuring tape or the eraser, magic marker, bill to pay or letter to respond to has gone.  It’s crazy town for sure.

Last week, we hosted our 7-year-old granddaughter for a few extra days after the 4^th.  It was pure joy to have her with us.  In between the work we feasted, we visited, shopped, boated, swam the lake and even went to a musical performance.   It was great having her here!

And yet, I am unable to shake a fuzz in my brain, a drip, drip, drip of discontent. I am weary and wary.   I cannot believe what has been going on these past days and like you, I’m trying to make sense of it.  How do you make sense of a senseless situation, though?  I question EVERYTHING I hear, read - I don’t know.  I feel like I am floating a bit, numb.  I am spiritually, emotionally, physically and politically drained.    I typically feel pretty confident, pretty firm-footed.  These days have hit me hard and I just don’t know.  I am wearing my fear, my doubt, the near unbearable sorrow, like clothes that don’t belong to me, don’t fit.

I am uncomfortable. 

But, we can do this.  We are better than these days. Give me a minute to plant my foot, to dress again in my truth, my understanding, my joy.  You do the same, okay?