Starting to adjust.

New traditions.  Is that an oxymoron? Can something be new and become a tradition simultaneously? Coming off a Thanksgiving weekend full of “new” traditions,  I am truly grateful.  I have much for which I am thankful.

  

As I get older and a bit more settled I am finding that my responsiveness to holidays is evolving, too.  Traditions are important, and I enjoy the heck out of them, but what is more important to me is the time together the traditions bring. I no longer have to race and fret, to plan and control, nor shop…oh my word, the shopping.  But, I’m not doing it ALL these days.  Younger women and men have stepped up, stepped in.   It can all happen around me.  I cook, sure.  I help my daughter get the dinner ready and plan the menu, yes.  I do pick up some ingredients here and there.  And, I forget stuff and have to send someone to the store…what of it?

I think Thanksgiving and the 4^th of July are my top two holidays.  I mean, they are neck and neck.  I would mention Halloween but I most just like the decorating. Of course, there is Christmas and I love Christmas.  I’ve got some feelings about Christmas that may be in contrast to what the “holiday” is intended and because of that inner discussion, I don’t put Christmas at the very top of the holiday list…now, anyone out there who needs to hear this, hear this: My ranking Christmas lower has nothing to do with my faith.

 

I am very thankful this year, maybe more so than in previous years, and I’ve tried to put gratitude at the forefront this holiday season.  Along with my focus on making adjustments in 2019, and being really decidedly grateful,  I will share that I am also determined to be more expressive, more in tune and in touch with people and things.  Some things I vow to learn more about are not so pleasant as I witness what is happening around the country, and some of those people, well, not so pleasant either.  One of the things I am most grateful for is my ability, my privilege, my right by golly, to be educated, informed and to be a voice. 

So what do I know about this anyway? Nothing, to be honest.  But, in my need to make adjustments I also vow to educate myself, to learn more, to not avoid or turn my head but to face both some beautiful and some darned ugly issues.  Are there topics you are afraid to approach?  I have some.  You want to hear about racism? I can get in to that with you.  WE can delve in to that together.  You want to talk about women’s rights? Oh, yes, hey…I am here for that.  Shall we explore reasonable gun legislation together? Okay, we can, but, I have to warn you, I am emotional on that one. I am willing, however, to hear your thoughts. 

I am making adjustments in 2019, and it starts from a place of thanksgiving, of true and sincere gratitude, more than just giving words around a table.  It takes a weekend in a hotel with five beautiful, happy, healthy, bouncing and joyous grandchildren to bring me to this place.  I have so much to be grateful for, I really do…and I bet you do, too.

Let’s roll up our sleeves together and do the work. 

Word of the day, of the year.

I took a break from posting on this blog for the past two months.  There were a couple of reasons why, but, mainly we were busy! I determined it best to fix my brain on keeping on task of all the things on my list.  Not that I am busier than other people…I most definitely am not. However, I had a lot on my mind, things I wanted to sort through mentally and physically.

 

Last year, when I wrote at around the end of the 2017, it was about intention, and more specifically to intend to live with joy.  I wrote about choosing a word, if I could choose just one, my word for 2017 was JOY, my word for 2018 was INTENT.

So, now, with the coming and going of my birthday, when I usually think about such things, and the sabbatical I took from posting, in order to sort through some stuff, I find myself again wondering about a word, just one word, that would be my driving thought for 2019, adding to the cloth I weave each day.  (Here’s last years post, if you would care to read again https://cindiswindow.blogspot.com/2017/12/word.html )

So many things have happened in 2018 that cause me to really consider my 2019. First was the big move back “home” this summer of my middle child with her husband and three of our five grandkids.  Having them here, living just around the corner, has been a gift.  We have helped with the kids as she and her husband finished up the sale of their house in Indianapolis.  I have done school pick-up, and dance class, and attended a cross country meet or two.  It has been glorious, as well as has made me miss our son, who moved from Seattle to Los Angeles this year, and our youngest and her family of four even more.

    

The second big change is coming soon…husband’s retirement on December 31.  I am both looking forward to it and am anxious about it.  All the jokes apply.  He is worried about the budget. I am worried about having him here, all day, every day.  I mean, he deserves the rest and relaxation, no doubt or question, but what am I going to do with him all day?  We had a few appointments and “real talks” related to social security and financial planning which took up large parts of a couple weeks.  While I was able to skate through most of those conversations, it was taking its toll on my husband who needs to feel secure in his decisions and some of the suggestions we heard were uncertain for him.  I don’t think he slept at all, to be honest, all through October!

Which brings me to another change.  I retired early and completely back in 2014 or so but recently accepted a contract for working from home part-time.  Too many details to get into here but some of my October busy-ness was preparing for this opportunity.  Setting a schedule, training, trying to get organized…all that was a time burner.  I am just getting all that under some control as its taken a while to warm up the ol’ memory banks and remember how to work like a professional not to mention reclaiming the office space, which is slow going.

Life is all about the twists and turns in our journey, though, and starting each day from where you are.  It’s a hard lesson sometimes, not looking back, not regretting earlier life decisions or wishing you had done something differently. Accepting that, hey, you are here, now, so go-ahead, make the changes and get going.

   

2019, folks…Adjust