Now, that was a week!

So we are sneaking up on the big holiday and I've had a multitude of special Christmas happenings already.  I mean, it's a good one, 2018, and we aren't even "there" yet!

A quick review of my last few days.  It's been busy and fun, and even though I ended my week with a bit of a virus, I wouldn't trade this week.  First, my husband and his valued crew host a holiday luncheon for their customers each year.  It's always nicely attended and appreciated.  This year, they recognized husband's upcoming retirement, too.  I went, along with our two-year old grandson, who had been charged to me for the day.  Grandbaby was a dream, husband was pleased and humble.  It was a great afternoon. 

Next, our son flew in from California for an extended weekend and we were super happy to have him around for a few days.  He looks good, he seems well and is a survivor of the bumps in his road this year.  Was really good to see him. 

Our family attended our local hospital's annual presentation of "Holiday at the Pops", with the local county symphony, and some special guests, including the children's choir our granddaughter participates in.  It was very, very good and the auditorium, which is also where her mom and dad had their wedding reception, housed a full audience.  It was hard not to think about that wonderful December night sixteen years ago, watching those two very young people, start their lives together, as they watched their lovely daughter. They were proud parents to be sure, and the children's choir was fabulous.  Our youngest daughter and son-in-law and their family had driven up for the evening, so our family was complete.

The next day was our annual family Cookie Sunday.   Again, our whole family in attendance, visiting with their cousins, kids running through the house, babies cooing and drooling...it was another wonderful day.  Much laughter, much food, many, many cookies.  It can be difficult to find the right date for this yearly celebration, but we do our best to get as many of us there as we can.  Its a beautiful thing. 

I became victim to a bit of a virus following Cookie Sunday and had to pass on riding along to return our son to the airport on Tuesday, and spent much of a couple of days supine on the couch, not even watching television.  I spent a lot of the time asleep, and a lot of the time wishing I could get up to do something.  After wrapping five presents and then having to sleep for two hours, I just resolved to pick it back up in a couple days. 

Friday night this week the children's choir has their own concert and we are very much looking forward to it.  The next morning we set off for Indianapolis to see the Nutcracker presented by the Indianapolis School of Ballet.  Our granddaughter gets to sit in the audience this year, and I will admit to being a little sad for that...but then I think about how she is just around the corner from me now, singing in the local children's choir, taking ballet at a new studio and enjoying her lake home.  Its a trade-off, yes, but its a solid trade. 

Forward, ho.

Moving forward to making some adjustments – financially, physically, emotionally, digging deep into things I was pretty sure I “just knew” to be true, clearing away some old habits and thoughts – I started a list.  My list contains areas where I would like adjustments, change, new outlooks, discussions and hey, things to keep.  You already know I am a list person, so a list shouldn’t be surprising, right?

What the list is, however, is evolving.  Living, really.  I make the list in my head, I think about the item I just put on the list and scratch it off or suspend it, or move it to the top I think its so vital and fantastic.  But, because my memory is not as great as it use to be (don’t tell my husband, I can still fool him in to thinking I remember something he does not, or have told him something that I maybe really did forget to mention), I have to write a large percentage of my thoughts down.  Sometimes I am of the mind that if I can’t remember the list, the list isn’t right.  Other times I recognize that the list is to be respected, so give it full attention and, shoot, go ahead and write that on the list.

I have many notebooks and if you read some previous blog posts, you know that I started a bullet journal of sorts earlier this year.  I have narrowed down that process quite a bit…the “experts” in this field would have you journaling all dang day…to just what I found I need.  A calendar, a list of books to read, a travel planner, a habit tracker (sorta) and meals and groceries make up my main pages.  There’s a few others that pop up once in a while, but mostly that’s it.

So for 2019 I am adding a new “favorite” to my planner/journal for areas I want to adjust, and will set some goals in order to meet those adjustments and frankly, I needed to think about how to get there, think about who I am.  Fact is this…I love to talk about things.  I love to discuss things with people I care about, or even people I just met. I like finding common ground.  I like to squint my eyes at them and say “You know?”.  I like learning things, reading up on stuff, discovering something new, on a wide range of topics.

 

You may know that Oprah says “This I know for sure…” Steve Jobs had “One more thing..” Now both of these mantras tie people to each other, or to a common thing and both these folks save this point til the end of their presentation.  Oprah bases hers in the human existence, and is usually near the last page of her magazine.  Jobs was more in the technology of humanity and spoke it at the end of an annual conference, but, they vie to bring us to a common place…connectivity.

 

Connectivity. My first adjustment goal.  I guess, truly, I have been practicing connectivity through this blog for a while.  It’s a little one sided, however, isn’t it?   One of the things I know about myself is I quite enjoy entertaining.  I like small groups,  I like discussions, I like to discover stuff and I like entertaining.  I can bring those things together.  Reach out to me if you think this is something you might be interested in, too.  I know a lot of small groups have what I will call themes…like knitting or bible studies or even homemaking tips and tricks, essential oils classes or  yoga.  I don’t have a theme, not necessarily even seeking a theme.  I enjoy open discussion, open laughter, open hearts and minds.
   

Let me know, and let the adjusting begin. 

Starting to adjust.

New traditions.  Is that an oxymoron? Can something be new and become a tradition simultaneously? Coming off a Thanksgiving weekend full of “new” traditions,  I am truly grateful.  I have much for which I am thankful.

  

As I get older and a bit more settled I am finding that my responsiveness to holidays is evolving, too.  Traditions are important, and I enjoy the heck out of them, but what is more important to me is the time together the traditions bring. I no longer have to race and fret, to plan and control, nor shop…oh my word, the shopping.  But, I’m not doing it ALL these days.  Younger women and men have stepped up, stepped in.   It can all happen around me.  I cook, sure.  I help my daughter get the dinner ready and plan the menu, yes.  I do pick up some ingredients here and there.  And, I forget stuff and have to send someone to the store…what of it?

I think Thanksgiving and the 4^th of July are my top two holidays.  I mean, they are neck and neck.  I would mention Halloween but I most just like the decorating. Of course, there is Christmas and I love Christmas.  I’ve got some feelings about Christmas that may be in contrast to what the “holiday” is intended and because of that inner discussion, I don’t put Christmas at the very top of the holiday list…now, anyone out there who needs to hear this, hear this: My ranking Christmas lower has nothing to do with my faith.

 

I am very thankful this year, maybe more so than in previous years, and I’ve tried to put gratitude at the forefront this holiday season.  Along with my focus on making adjustments in 2019, and being really decidedly grateful,  I will share that I am also determined to be more expressive, more in tune and in touch with people and things.  Some things I vow to learn more about are not so pleasant as I witness what is happening around the country, and some of those people, well, not so pleasant either.  One of the things I am most grateful for is my ability, my privilege, my right by golly, to be educated, informed and to be a voice. 

So what do I know about this anyway? Nothing, to be honest.  But, in my need to make adjustments I also vow to educate myself, to learn more, to not avoid or turn my head but to face both some beautiful and some darned ugly issues.  Are there topics you are afraid to approach?  I have some.  You want to hear about racism? I can get in to that with you.  WE can delve in to that together.  You want to talk about women’s rights? Oh, yes, hey…I am here for that.  Shall we explore reasonable gun legislation together? Okay, we can, but, I have to warn you, I am emotional on that one. I am willing, however, to hear your thoughts. 

I am making adjustments in 2019, and it starts from a place of thanksgiving, of true and sincere gratitude, more than just giving words around a table.  It takes a weekend in a hotel with five beautiful, happy, healthy, bouncing and joyous grandchildren to bring me to this place.  I have so much to be grateful for, I really do…and I bet you do, too.

Let’s roll up our sleeves together and do the work. 

Word of the day, of the year.

I took a break from posting on this blog for the past two months.  There were a couple of reasons why, but, mainly we were busy! I determined it best to fix my brain on keeping on task of all the things on my list.  Not that I am busier than other people…I most definitely am not. However, I had a lot on my mind, things I wanted to sort through mentally and physically.

 

Last year, when I wrote at around the end of the 2017, it was about intention, and more specifically to intend to live with joy.  I wrote about choosing a word, if I could choose just one, my word for 2017 was JOY, my word for 2018 was INTENT.

So, now, with the coming and going of my birthday, when I usually think about such things, and the sabbatical I took from posting, in order to sort through some stuff, I find myself again wondering about a word, just one word, that would be my driving thought for 2019, adding to the cloth I weave each day.  (Here’s last years post, if you would care to read again https://cindiswindow.blogspot.com/2017/12/word.html )

So many things have happened in 2018 that cause me to really consider my 2019. First was the big move back “home” this summer of my middle child with her husband and three of our five grandkids.  Having them here, living just around the corner, has been a gift.  We have helped with the kids as she and her husband finished up the sale of their house in Indianapolis.  I have done school pick-up, and dance class, and attended a cross country meet or two.  It has been glorious, as well as has made me miss our son, who moved from Seattle to Los Angeles this year, and our youngest and her family of four even more.

    

The second big change is coming soon…husband’s retirement on December 31.  I am both looking forward to it and am anxious about it.  All the jokes apply.  He is worried about the budget. I am worried about having him here, all day, every day.  I mean, he deserves the rest and relaxation, no doubt or question, but what am I going to do with him all day?  We had a few appointments and “real talks” related to social security and financial planning which took up large parts of a couple weeks.  While I was able to skate through most of those conversations, it was taking its toll on my husband who needs to feel secure in his decisions and some of the suggestions we heard were uncertain for him.  I don’t think he slept at all, to be honest, all through October!

Which brings me to another change.  I retired early and completely back in 2014 or so but recently accepted a contract for working from home part-time.  Too many details to get into here but some of my October busy-ness was preparing for this opportunity.  Setting a schedule, training, trying to get organized…all that was a time burner.  I am just getting all that under some control as its taken a while to warm up the ol’ memory banks and remember how to work like a professional not to mention reclaiming the office space, which is slow going.

Life is all about the twists and turns in our journey, though, and starting each day from where you are.  It’s a hard lesson sometimes, not looking back, not regretting earlier life decisions or wishing you had done something differently. Accepting that, hey, you are here, now, so go-ahead, make the changes and get going.

   

2019, folks…Adjust

Making a list.

There’s been a fair amount of head scratching and pondering going on at the homestead these last couple of weeks as we move into the last quarter of hubs’ full time work and ease into retirement.  There’s been meetings, phone calls, discussions, paperwork, more meetings.  It’s been an education, that is for sure.  I think it is good? It is a bit scary.

So, we have been doing a fair amount of “taking stock” and making lists.  Doing a little “what’s that?” as we go through some boxes in the attic. It’s not been all drudgery…we did make some post retirement travel plans this week, and spent some great family times, caught a Broadway show.  We bought a “new” car and one of these days, we’ll hit the road in it.

I like making plans for the future.  I have always liked looking at my budget, making lists, crossing things off the list.  I am one of “those”.  I have little notebooks for all my wondering mind thoughts, questions and plans.  I think you are either a list maker or not.  Hubs seems to be able to keep everything in his head…I like to see it written down.  And if I can use a highlighter, well, that’s even better. I also like spreadsheets and I am one of those people who fill in my little lines and boxes with color because I am also a color person although to look at my wardrobe you might not think it.  I am a bit heavy in to grey these days.  Except in my spreadsheets.

I am not always known for following the rules.  I have jumped out of the car while in the student pick up lane to run inside rather than wait.  I have had more than 12 items in the express checkout line, snuck in to a private lounge.   Just this morning I had nachos for breakfast.  But, I also try to follow the rules that keep me and mine safe and secure.  Like, wear your seat belt, sit down, arms and legs inside at all times, three meals a day, moisturize and drink lots of water.  And oh yeah, make a retirement spending plan.

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A glimpse.

It is funny how things can creep up on you…wrinkles, grey hair, weight, the changing seasons, sunrise later and later, sunset earlier and earlier.  It’s so slow as to almost be unnoticeable and then all of a sudden you realize it’s dark as you make dinner.  I think of all the beautiful sunrises I have experienced this summer, shocked to be awake so very early as that is definitely not my way.  And now, it’s as if I am waiting on the sun so my day can begin.  It is funny.

Another thing that changes around here quickly is boating to not boating, swimming to not swimming.  We were just discussing when to take the boat out of the water, would the kids want to tube and realized maybe, but there might not be time. Maybe once or twice?  But, it’s been consistently rainy so will they? We usually take the speed boat out first, followed by the pontoon boat a couple weeks later.  There can be some great pontoon evenings into October…especially when there is a low, full moon. Dreamy.

I love going out on the lake at night.  Sometimes the bugs are a bit pesty, but, watching the boat cut through the inky darkness of the water…shining a light into the lake to see into the world below the surface a bit.  Watching people on shore, moving around a bonfire, smelling those same fires…hearing the laughter roll across the water, being a part of it but not being a part of it. Snuggling with a chilly, sleepy grandchild under a blanket as we talk moon and stars, gliding along. Lake life is the best life. 

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A quick check in…

First, I am about 75% with my new commitment to daily moisturizer, but, my skin does feel better.  If you are like me and have been ignoring moisturizer for a while, do it.  I am using an Olay product.  If you are younger than I and don’t moisturize regularly, well, change should be your goal, and remember, don't forget your neck and chest.  You'll thank me in twenty years. 

So, I had a visit with my doctor last week and bemoaned my morning blood sugar readings.  Not alarming, but why always higher than what I think they would be after not eating for 12 hours?  She suggested a bedtime healthy snack and some evening exercise, like a walk or stationary bike.

Not a serious walker but trying to get better and I can’t imagine trying to walk at night, after dinner, when hubs is thinking ice cream, but, we’ll see.  Anyway, I’ll let you know.

We hosted a fun get-together last weekend…charcuterie and wine.  I set up a huge board, covered in parchment, on the island and we just added the contributions as people came in the door with a cheese, or a meat or a jar of nuts or olives. One person brought a large vegetable tray, which was perfect, and another included a curry chicken salad, which we devoured.   We even had figs.  It was fun, it was great food, lots of laughs. I also set up a grilled cheese/quesadilla bar for the kiddos.  We liked it so much we had left over cheese and meats with family the next night, and a grilled cheese bar for grown ups and kids the third night.  We are now on a cheese moratorium for a few days, but, it was a super fun weekend and Monday, with swimming, boating and tubing thrown in. It’s back to school and back to work, and there's been some rainy days to keep things kind of slow and lazy.

 

I’ve been keeping an eye on shadows in the yard, and how the air is starting to feel, and I know the season is winding down. The lake is more quiet and here we are, at Labor Day weekend.  We have a few more days of “summer” but we all know it’s coming.  The memories will be big from this summer. 

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Facing it. Literally.

So, I am facing the truth about getting older.  It happens, better than the alternative, all that aside,my skin has taken a dramatic turn (okay, semi-dramatic). It’s bumpy and scratchy and what the heck?

I think its my fault.  I am not a moisturizer.  I am not even a cleanser.  I have never had a skin care routine and, well, it is beginning to show.  My mom did her routine every night with Ponds Cold Cream, sometimes Noxema, and Oil of Olay which she then progressed to Loreal Night Cream and on to Estee Lauder.   Her skin looked good beyond the time she was no longer able to care for herself, I assume because she had taken care of it for years. So you think I would know better.

   

That is not my truth I’m afraid.  I should have been paying more attention in my 30’s, 40’s and 50’s.  Heck, maybe even my 20’s.  I was a lucky teenager with out many skin problems and well, I just haven’t done a good job at incorporating skin care into my life.  Now it seems like that may be showing on my face.

 

It’s not surprising that I am no good at skin care routines.  I am not good at scheduled stuff it seems…I never had spaghetti every Wednesday, nor Taco Tuesday.  I don’t eat fish on Friday and well, an apple a day skipped me by.  I am not good at taking my blood pressure at home or using a glucometer to monitor my blood sugar, neglect to water my plants and God knows I have not been a successful dieter. Exercise? Forget it.  I sleep late, am rarely on time and well, forget appointments.

Years ago I saw Andie McDowell on the Tonight show and she reported that her mom advised her to moisturize, moisturize, moisturize and not to forget her neck and décolletage and of course, to stay away from the sun.  So, I have tried to teach my girls this important routine, without practicing it myself, and found myself even saying it to my nine-year-old granddaughter this week.  This summer I have spent more time in the sun without sunscreen than ever before and I think my face is showing it.  Is 63 too late to start a serious skin care routine, do you think?

I stopped at Walgreens yesterday and stocked up on a couple Olay products and some cleanser.  I am going to give this a whirl as when I brushed my hand across my cheek over the weekend and it literally dragged across, I thought “Oh heck no…we will not have this”.  So, exfoliate, cleanse, moisturize and protect is my new mantra.  Please tell me I look fabulous next time you see me…I could use a boost. 

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Never too old to dream.

This week one of my dreams is coming true.  One of my adult children, along with her husband and three children, are moving “home” to my town.  She left for college at 18 and never looked back, or so I thought.  She was looking back, however, and a spark for living in her hometown became a flame…and oh, enough with being poetic! I am doing cartwheels over here I am so happy.

All three of my kids left for parts unknown, or Indianapolis, when they were finished with college.  While the oldest didn’t quite finish his education at Indiana University, he didn’t move home, either.  Now living in LA, I only get to see him once or twice a year, three times if I am lucky.  His visits are always welcome, and never long enough. The two girls both married boys from other towns and settled in Indianapolis right out of college.  An absolutely great town, we have enjoyed many wonderful times in Indianapolis, with lots more to come as we love that town, and our youngest, with her adorable family, still lives there.

Many times over the years friends and family have asked “Do you think one of the kids will move home?” and our answer was always “No”.  Both of our sons-in-law, and this daughter, are in technology related fields.  There’s not a lot of their particular kind of work in Northern Indiana, folks.  But, through advancement of “remote” opportunities, both are keeping their current jobs and will be working remotely.

We spent time in Indianapolis this weekend packing up the house they have lived in for twelve years.  It was bittersweet.  Their place served as “home base” for many family events.  We have had great times in their home, on their deck. Even hugely pregnant with her first baby, they opened their home to host wedding events for her younger sister, who married in Indianapolis, ten years ago.  That house on Lincoln Court is special for all of us, for many reasons.  I wish I could tell you how many times my husband has said “I love that deck”.

 

Yesterday was bittersweet for all of us as we packed boxes and loaded the truck.  I was lucky to get to empty the bookshelf of all the photo albums and spent a couple minutes flipping through pages and memories, oh so many memories.  I am so looking forward to what’s ahead…much to do as the house they are moving into is a bit smaller, with less storage, is on a great lot, on the lake she grew up on, a fantastic place to raise their family.  Oh and is less than five minutes from ME!

As my nine-year-old granddaughter said a couple of times on Saturday as she and I packed up her room “This is really happening! I have butterflies!”  Yes, my love, I know the feeling!

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Is it really almost over?

Summer is busy. I have been away from posting to the blog over the last couple of weeks. As we continue to work on landscaping around the house I am bone tired some days.  We have hosted a few cook-outs and get-togethers, and I held my annual Camp GiGi with four of the five grandchildren, the youngest just not quite ready to join in.  My goodness how they are growing, though. 

Having the grands around is always a lot of fun. I try to allow them very little “screen time” and more outside time, but, even I have to give in to a little TV or video games during dinner prep or wind down time. My nine-year-old granddaughter became fascinated with a game show about baking, so I figured there was not much harm to that. She would watch it on her tablet on Netflix with my three-year-old granddaughter squeezed in next to her, her dark brown head nestled on the blonde’s shoulder.  We were “on” for those days.  I was anxious for husband to come in from work as, just like he was when our kids were little, he brought fun, game ideas, rough-housing, boating…we all love it when PaPa comes rolling in. 

I have totally ignored the moon garden which was big on my to-do list for this year. I mean, I did some initial things, but other projects took over my time and interest.  I so want to get in there and improve the soil, trim some tree branches to allow a little more light.  I need to figure out a way to discourage those woodland creatures from visiting. There’s lots of space up there, surely they can share. 

I surprised even myself this year and used more orange in my flowers than I have ever done.  I just obtained a really pretty orangey, coral pink azalea for use by the house.  Just waiting on a landscape timber to get her in the ground.  Since our house is a totally different color than it was before the remodeling I have discovered I really like the orange tones against the grayish green.  Let’s face it, orange is a happy color!

We are entering those dog days of August…hot, humid on some days with lazy, long afternoons. The shadows are changing in the yard and the lake activity dies down more and more each day.  Soon the school buses will be rattling down the road, stopping to pick up little ones lined up along the street in their shiny new clothes and oversized backpacks.

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The post 4th wind down.

Yesterday was an absolutely beautiful day; it followed one of the best 4^th of July weekends (extended) ever…two events were held here at what we lovingly call the “compound”.  First, we hosted the annual family 4^th, with friends, fireworks, food, family.  Now it was hot and humid but cooled off for the rest of the week.  On Saturday, the property boasted a festive look for a graduation party for our nephew.  The weather that day was unbelievable, truly, and we had a great day.  His parents did all the work and we just relaxed and attended the party.  (They are the nephew and niece building next door, but their house is just started.)

Sunday was clean-up the yard, remove the tables and chairs, tents, games and décor, took a boat ride with swimming, followed up with saying good bye to family.   Yesterday I did nothing.  Not a thing.  I was bone tired. An evening boat ride, a late invite to have leftovers and ice cream before bed. We deserved that.  But, today is back at it.

  

So, its early on a Tuesday, I’ve checked my email, checked Facebook, responded to a couple things, looked at my budget, started a grocery list, folded some laundry and the beach towels, and committed to two hours outside weeding flowers and believe it or not, I still have a couple plants to get into pots or the ground. I was outside for an hour, lugging water and weed snips all around the yard when the humidity struck. After almost none for three or four days and some beautiful, breezy weather, the return of the humidity at 8:00 a.m. was a bit of a surprise.  While I did get everything watered the weed snipping will have to wait for a bit.  As sweat rolled down my face and off my chin I wondered what the heck was I doing and a return to nothing quickly took over my schedule. I may get some things done later today, like maybe I will go to the grocery store since I have put that off for about a week, even with the parties and house guests.

 

I used to not mind the grocery store, now, it’s not my favorite thing to do.  I try to use a menu and a list, so I can minimize the strolling the aisles, but I am again in a rut with what to prepare for dinner.  It is sometimes good that hubs will eat anything and doesn’t complain over sandwiches for dinner much ~ as long as there are “real” meals every couple of days.  He understands it’s boring, hot, boring and planning dinners for 40+ years has lost its sheen. Add to that I don’t have as much as an appetite as he has, and things can get pretty lean around here.  I can’t pass up a good charcuterie board though and could make a dinner from one without batting an eye.  He is not a big cheese fan and even so, that’s a snack not dinner in his eyes.

I can also get by with a bowl of cereal for dinner…and not gonna lie, this morning I had cherry pie for breakfast.   

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Ribbons of thought.

When I was a much younger human, I was separated from my half-siblings.  Raised with my brother and sister, my family also included three half-brothers and a half-sister, all at least ten years older than myself.  My parents had each been married before, each having two children.

Now, my dad’s two kids were with their mother most of the time and we rarely saw them.  My mom’s boys, however, were with our grandmother and we saw them on summer breaks and holidays.  There’s a lot I don’t understand about how that all played out, and some of the details have gone to the grave with the players, but, I would guess the parties involved all thought they were doing the right thing.

 

I was raised well.  We were expected to behave properly, with manners, and with a full understanding of what was right and wrong.  We often dined in public, in restaurants, as we traveled, and were expected to know how to act. My parents were often complimented on our appearance and behavior.  Given that we moved so much, it’s a wonder we functioned, but we did. We adjusted, for sure.

I was thinking this week how much time I have spent in this little town I call home.  Never far from my address, I know this property well having walked it for forty years.  However, I can’t recall the names of towns I lived in as a kid there were so many. Moses Lake, Washington is one I remember because it’s a funny name and because I remember my mom use to regularly report it was 114 degrees there once.  I don’t know how long we were there but I think I was in second grade.  My younger brother was to be right behind me in first grade but hadn’t attended kindergarten yet so had to do that in Moses Lake.  I remember my mom being kind of upset by that, and I am not sure why. 

It is funny as we get older how things pop into our head, as clear as if they had happened yesterday.  Of course, we probably have all had the experience of a smell bringing a memory back, unprompted and sometimes shockingly clear. Once a faint smell of leather brought my dad to me, coming in from work and the three of us kids fighting over who would help him take off his work boots. Him sitting down with a cold beer, a plate of saltines and cheese, maybe braunschweiger or just a handful of mixed nuts.  My mom always had something ready for him to nibble on as she cooked dinner.  He would then go in to shower, coming back out in a white tee shirt and slacks, wet hair combed back.  Sometimes he would have a second beer, sometimes he would have a "highball", offering to make one for mom, which she usually declined. We would run outside until dinner, playing in and around his pickup truck, while he relaxed from his day and watched the news, read the paper.    

Some memories are gone as quickly as they came. Some hang around a bit, turning over and around, playing a bit of hide and seek, letting themselves float back up more readily than before. I can bring these memories of my dad to the surface quicker now, I guess because I've allowed them to linger.  Lately, I find myself wishing I could ask my mom some of the questions that now circle around some of my memories, that I could tie some of those ribbons together. Like, what's a highball anyway? What in the world is in braunschweiger or am I better off not knowing?     

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Choose wisely.

Still working on landscaping this week but getting closer every day.  A little bit more, a little bit less. I know we are knocking items off our list, but the list seems to grow at the same pace. 

I did take a bit of time away this week to take my wonderful nephew, Jack, to see Rent in Indianapolis.  He is a big fan of live Broadway, has a musician’s soul and heart, and I knew he would love the show; he did, I did and one of my daughters went along, too, and she did.  Now,  she and I have seen Rent a few times, both live and the movie and it still pulls at the feels.  We went all in for a new dining experience in an area of Indianapolis known for its small restaurants, clubs, shops and arts, and a second day trip to the Indianapolis Museum of Art, now known as Newfields.  It was a good couple of days.

Last minute get-togethers, friends on the lake. Neighbors helping neighbors, family dropping by to help with projects or just a touch base to see what’s new, little kids running in the yard and robbing the candy jar. It makes my heart sing.  Children always bring me joy.   

I believe in what I do.  I believe in posting happy pictures and sentiments both here and on Facebook.  I accept it won’t impact the political climate of this country, or maybe it will in a very disconnected, down the chain fashion if ONE person decides to go positive, go for love, when making a statement, pass a judgement or please, for goodness sake, cast a vote.  These are unsettling times, they are. I call myself a person of faith and yearn, burningly, to act like one, speak like one, love like one.  Keep your chin up, and keep your heart, your empathy, because there is a BIG need. 

Be careful, be cautious of spreading hate as that will come back at you tenfold…I promise, and so will love.  I choose love.

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Where did that month go?

I think I may have bought enough plants for this year.  May have…but there is still time to decide for sure.  I have about 5 pots of various perennials and a couple annuals that do not yet have a home, however,  rain somewhat delayed the planting progress for a time.  There is also still a large, very large, amount of landscaping prep to undertake before some of these items go in the ground, but, I am making headway. My sons-in-law helped tremendously on a flower bed over Memorial Day weekend which took a huge chunk off my "to do" list.  

When we remodeled (starting two years ago now), it disrupted all four sides of the house, and the foundation and any grass, shrubs, flowers, gravel, mulch…any of it…was destroyed in the process.  Now, I don’t mind “re-do” on these four areas but, boy, is my back tired!  I have spent the last several days digging out, dividing and replanting.  Some of my plants and shrubs, that weren’t destroyed, are pretty well established but no longer of the right size or in the right spot. 

I have also recently discovered, and this is a big one, that there are just not enough hours in the day.  I know I don’t move as fast as I use to, and it takes me longer to make a decision than it did when all my decisions had to be made on the fly…things came up so quickly.  Now, I get to ponder but, boy, that’s a time burner.  I find myself walking around, poking at the flower beds and wondering if I should move that azalea, but, it likes it there, but its too big, and there’s a good spot for something like that right over here…time burner. Even so, it’s been a gratifying few days.  Things are taking shape.  Rain slowed me down but it sped up the plants.  Things are green and growing, have had a power burst from the rain and I also discovered I am a master ponderer.   

 

Seeing lots of friends and family post on Facebook about their kids growth and moving on to their next grade level, their awards and recognition has been a lot of fun.  My grandkids among them.  My little guys have all had good years at school and pre-school/daycare.  They are happy and healthy and I am forever blessed.  I hope you are in a place where happiness can easily be seen and felt!  June is here, and it's going to be a great summer.  Get out! 

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An early start.

I spent yesterday moving a heavy piece of assembled decking around the yard.  My back today is going to keep me from doing a lot of planting, and it is a gorgeous day.  The flowers are out and ready, but, I’m a bit too sore to do much of that. 

I was up early today and sat down by the water on the little bench the niece-neighbor brought out a couple years ago.  We washed it down and oiled it earlier this spring on a couple of warmish days.  It is back in its spot on the porch of the shed and is a welcome place to sit in the morning, birds chirping and flitting about…a great vantage point for watching little dog walk all around the property.  I am glad to be back outside in these early morning hours, coffee in hand and thinking about my plan for the day.

 

I walked down to the pier, and out to check the bottom of the lake that I could see, before the lily pads take over, to peer from the pier.  Geese squawked from the lake, wondering when I would vacate so they could get back on shore to leave their droppings all over.  There were three sets of parents and their little goslings…cute but annoying. The mess they make of the shoreline irritates me.

 

A stroll around the house after a sunny day tickles me as the perennials have started poking up through the ground and unfurling their leaves.  I delight in what wasn’t there yesterday but is there today.  A walk out on the trail to nowhere and to the moon garden area results in a mental list…”If my back were not so sore today I would…” The squirrels and chipmunks have left big holes in the ground.  We will have to have a conversation about that, oh chattering squirrel.  That is not cool.

Continuing on the trail, I made note of the many clumps of daffodil leaves poking up without blooms.  I’ll need to divide those and replant, which I can manage a bit later this spring.  There are also tons of daffodils in bloom, so pretty, but more would be fine, too!

Back into the house to feed little dog and grab some breakfast before getting on with the day.  The walk did my back good, and my ol’ stiff knees.  Maybe I will be able to get out there and dig in some dirt after all.

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Tiny squirrels, tiny patience.

Started accumulating a few plants to fill up the many, many pots.  I have worked on the “dry creek bed” at the downspout area and fought the urge, fought it again, still fighting, to put something in the ground.  I have started “hardening” the few plants I have by setting them outside and then bringing them back in at night.  We have a few more days of cold nights…below 40…ahead but I think the freeze is over.  Possibly.  There’s a chance that Wednesday will get below 32.  Come on.  My patience is wearing thin.  

For the last couple of years we have had a black squirrel running around the property.  I have only seen one, at least I think its just one.  However, this morning I noticed a little bitty black squirrel, a baby, chasing around with other tiny squirrels.  Now, my old neighbor told me when we first spotted the lone black squirrel a couple years ago that they are not a separate type of squirrel but more of a rare coloring of your typical squirrel.  So, it’s not like I have new varieties of squirrels popping up, just regular old squirrels that have a degree of “melanism”.  Here’s some info, if you would care to learn more: https://animalsake.com/facts-about-black-squirrels

At any rate, the tiny little squirrels chasing around and around the wood chip pile and up and down trees this morning are very entertaining.  As soon as they start uprooting my plantings I will be less enamored, I’m sure. 


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Spring marches on.

Yesterday I watched two white birds circle the lake, hover, dive and circle again.  I watched the birds for a long time, trying to determine just exactly what they were.  I am hoping they come back today, so I can get a better view of them.  Yesterday was just too cold to walk down to the lakeshore for a closer look; today is a bit better but, they haven't shown up yet.  And, no, they were not sea gulls but, thanks for that. I have my guess as to what they were but need a closer look to know for sure. 

I am not necessarily a bird watcher. I am more of a bird appreciator but it’s not something I spend a lot of time thinking about.  In the spring, though, like today, and in the morning, I am fascinated by bird behavior.  Like, right now, for example, I glanced out the window and way, way up in the sky is a big bird, circling, I can’t make it out enough to know for sure, but my guess is its one of the bald eagles that has settled in to our area. It’s cloudy today but the sky is very blue, and this guy was easy to spot, hunting for breakfast.

I need to shake it up a bit, however, and watching out my window is one of those things I need to consider...as in giving it a rest.   Complaining *almost* silently about the snow and temperature this early April is not how I hoped it to go, and being inside even less so.  Its going to stay pretty much mid-30s today which makes it just a little too tough to dig into the wood chip pile or to think about having some dirt delivered. I am going to shop for dirt. Of all the things I would like to have for the yard this year, a load of dirt is going to be the big expense. Maybe even a load of river rock. Hey, big spender.

I am watching a woodpecker out my window now and wondering how many holes it can punch into this particular tree before the tree gives up. From the looks of the tree, thousands. I really wanted to get a picture of him to share with you, but woodpeckers flit and he's being mighty coy.  Husband and I spent a little time in the woods this past weekend, surveying the trees, picking up limbs and sticks, blowing leaves off the walking trail, explaining my ideas for the moon garden and talking about undergrowth and “weed trees”. Grateful to be able to spend a little time outside, doing what we do every spring in unspring-like temperature, but it still felt good,  I may get about an hour in the low 40s mid-afternoon today to venture out and move around some rocks.. 

 

Yesterday I put out a call for help this weekend to put in the pier.  The weather is to improve a bit and the water should warm up, at least a little, as I am sure it is not the most comfortable thing to walk in icy cold lake water.  A bonfire might come in handy, even if in the early part of the day, and of course there will be food and drink.  Because, it’s a pier raising, and still a party.  


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We will get there again.

This has been a crazy week, with the stock market going up, then down, then up…then, who knows? Then, there’s the snow issue.  I’ve written about April snow before and well, I don’t like it one bit.  I have sweet little primrose blossoms trying to push their way through and it isn’t going well for them, nor all the daffodils that sprinkle the woods with their smiley yellow.  What did they ever do except look precious and sweet?

Good news is I am watching robins daily.  Now, I am keeping an eye on the light fixtures around the house to prevent nests from appearing.  I know some of you would just say “Oh, let them nest on top of that light!” but, you know, its just not my thing.  I like birds but really don’t think they need to nest on the house.  Especially not my new light fixtures.

 

I am still struggling with the right piece of furniture to put on the front porch area.  I’m now just without anything out there.  The wicker settee that I had moved there came back in to the screen porch last week for a party and has not been moved out.  The screen porch is the next project to be completed, is about 90% and awaits the arrival of the ceiling tongue and groove boards, and the shiplap to complete the project.  Yes, shiplap.  I drank the kool-aid and admit I kind of like the look, at least for now.

Another project I am undertaking this next week is the top of my desk and the office/guest bedroom closet.  I am just going to have to bite the bullet and buy another tote for Christmas decorations that can go in the attic.  I couldn’t possibly squeeze another box in this closet, and I feel like I have condensed as much as I can.  Now, this is from the lady who doesn’t put up a tree remember?  Yes, and still has that many boxes of Christmas stuff, and there may be just a bit of Halloween crammed in that closet as well.

  

Construction is going on all around me this spring as the neighbors across the way are finishing their garage, the house next door is being renovated and the big project – the brand new house.  Its going to be noisy and not always the most convenient perhaps since we share a yard and driveway, but, we are all so excited to see that house get underway!

I am looking forward to it warming up just a bit more…to longer days and being able to sit on the deck, with a fire in the firepit, or down by the bonfire. Maybe with an adult beverage, a cheese or two, as we say goodnight to the day.   

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Getting out in it.

I started on a bit of the landscaping needs around the house this week.  It is still cold, rainy (at least today) and windy, but gosh I needed to get out there.  For a couple different reasons, really.  One, it is driving me crazy to see all this dirt and two, my doctor advises more activity.  Nothing like moving a couple wheelbarrow loads of wood chips to be active.  Since its too early to bring in plants and flowers, I am concentrating on woodchips, and feeding azaleas. 

As you may remember, my pile of wood chips is from two summers ago, when we were first starting to plan the remodeling.  I asked the guys who were cutting down the trees if they could leave a little.  They said either they leave the whole load or none.  So, I had them dump the load from that last day.  Which, thankfully, was not ALL the wood chips from the job.  The wood chips have been used for two seasons, the huge pile is now pretty compacted and tough to shovel. Long live the pitchfork!  Why didn’t anyone tell me to use a pitchfork last year? The year before?  I moved woodchips to a couple places yesterday and although my back is paying for it today, the pitchfork was the right tool for the job. I will be out there moving woodchips later this week, if it stops raining.  I may even finish the walking trail.

It has remained cold where I am and the flowers are slow, but I remind myself it is only March.  I cleared some landscape areas I maybe should have left alone for a little while longer but, golly, I am anxious to see some color, some blooms.  I am struggling with furniture for the front door area…can’t decide what to put out there.  Everything I thought would work seems wrong.  I lost out on purchasing a chair a few weeks ago at the Habitat store that I think would have been just right.  But, not wishing to cry over spilled milk, I move on.  Remembering that chair has made all other chairs pale in comparison.  Yes, it’s that bad darn it!

I purchased two, tall, black, made from recycled materials, plastic pots for the porch at Target this week.  I am fond of these guys and can’t wait to load them up with some impatiens and coleus, sweet potato vine… be still my heart.  It means moving some other pots off the porch but goodness knows I have places for those, too. I remain determined in the moon garden and am keeping watch on the light patterns that hit that spot now, since a couple trees have fallen or been taken down.  I have been waiting on previous plantings to sprout so I can make a list of what might be staying and what will be replaced.  Last year I planted two bright, lime green hosta but I don't think they made it through the poor soil and rough winter.  We'll see, but those are two plants I expect to have to replace, among, of course, the white columbine, which I will probably abandon.  Love columbine but it just does not love me. Since I am revamping this area and beefing up the soil I plan on replacing a few plants, and introduce more pots of annuals.     

Coming up on Easter and usually daffodils adorn the table.  I am not sure that will happen this year but I did see the early snowdrops late last week, so I know the daffodils are coming! We will have family here, so much laughter and love will fill the house.  Weather forecasts indicate we will be inside…but, we’ll see.  We are hardy stock and are called to be outside.   

Oh, and just for fun, I came across this article and thought some of you might also enjoy...I hope to visit a couple of these spots soon!  http://www.midwestliving.com/travel/around-the-region/12-standout-midwest-garden-centers/




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More color, more color.

It seems to be a slow start to spring, doesn’t it? I mean it just won’t kick in.  Today is a good example…it is sunny but boy is it cold.  Another 10 or 15 degrees would make all the difference!

Last week, I went out looking for unique items to place in flower beds or pots.  The stores are filling up with all the usual stuff but I want the unusual. Something fun, colorful but not cheap looking.   I have spent hours on sites like Pinterest looking at ideas, saving pins, trying to locate items featured, or something close that catches my eye.  This week I begin rehab of the moon garden, starting with the soil.  I think there is one plant in that area that I can salvage, maybe two.

 

We spent several days away from home again this week to attend some events with grandchildren.  The highlights were a talent show and a six-year old’s birthday party.  I mean, it can’t get much better.  The kids are so funny, so much fun. Now, I think we will be spending several weekends at home as we finish up some projects around the house to get ready for summer, although I am sure I will squeak out a visit to grandkids even if I go alone.

 

Even though it is just now spring, talk of summer creeps into our conversations.  Summer comes fast and the “big” events require some planning! In going out and about I came across a huge display of 4^th of July decorations already, and the Easter grass isn’t even off the shelves yet!  For some reason, this doesn’t’ bother me as much as Christmas decorations shoving out Halloween costumes.  4^th of July is different for me this year, too, with a mantle and two new porches to decorate!

And speaking of mantles, I can’t tell you how much fun I had with Valentine’s Day and St. Patrick’s Day and doing just a touch of something different on the mantle.  Nothing huge, just a swap out of a couple of little things but brought me much joy.  I’m setting out a bit of Easter today.  I am sure hubs thinks I am about the silliest. So, yes,  I am starting to think about getting the screen porch finished, the deck railing, busting out 4^th of July decorations and having a yard and house full of friends and family. A girl can dream.

Today, however, I am bundling up a bit, throwing on some work gloves and heading out to work some compost into the moon garden area.  It needs help people.  I largely ignored this area last year while working on the house and I am being punished for it now.  Give me a few weeks, however, and she’ll be back! I have new pots on order, as I think to feel more success here I will have to use planters and pots, with some good potting soil, and a fun piece of garden statuary tucked away for just this spot! I moved an azalea here last year, and trusting she made it through the winter, it will be a nice, new anchor for this spot.  It is pink not white so I have decided to run with it and use a bit of pink, along with the lavender and silver already there, and declare it Lady Esmerelda’s Prime Pastel Garden and Water Respite.  Just kidding.  I just call it the moon garden, but with more color.

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